Fine Line

Before I left for a little jaunt to Atlanta to visit Mr.M's parents I was approached by a high level VP at my work.

He popped his head into my cube and said "hey, got a second?"

My mind raced - what the heck could he want to talk to me about?!?

"Sure" I replied as calmly as possible.

Then he turned around and started walking - which means I guess that whatever he wanted to talk to me about is either longer than a seconds worth of conversation or I was in deep shit.

I walked behind him - mind still racing.

I step into his office and he leans in with his voice down and says "have you made your company aware of your intentions?"

I searched my mind as quickly as I could to figure out what he was talking about. Until I came to it - "OH, yes, of course! My boss is actually the one who facilitated me talking with your company."

He responded, "Great, we'll get this started then."

As I walked back to my cube my heard was pounding and I was still racking my brain as to what the hell he was talking about. Get what started? Intentions? Why the secrecy?

So instead of sit and stew on it - I wrote the VP an email. I explained that I had told my boss about my interest in the other side of the company. The client service side of it. THe side that has a higher earning potential and tons more marketability as far as job skills go.

She, being the rock star boss that she is told me to go and talk to a VP at the end of the hall about what the role could offer and what would be the challenges. So I went and met with this VP (which isn't the VP who approached me) and we talked vaguely about the role and basically it was more of an imformation gathering session. I pulled back a bit after that meeting because I was in fear of moving too quickly.

I've become very comfortable (for lack of a better word)in my current job. I come and go as I please, I can have a long lunch every once and a while and no one blinks. I'm encouraged to take plenty of vacations and never work nights and weekends. Moving to a new company and a new position freaks me out because I could be going from something I know is good to something unknown.

I met with the VP about what exactly he was talking about a few days later. He told me there was an immediate opening and would basically like to offer me the job. The Client Service director asked for me by name and the whole team had agreed with the request. I was quite flattered - but told him I was going to tell my boss about this to keep everyone in the loop.

When I told my most amazing boss of all time about it. Her reaction was what I thought it would be. Surprised and sad but excited for me. She also suggested that we do my review immediately so I could have all the information needed to make an informed decision.

My review was definitely not a reason to stay in my current position. The words she wrote were quite flattering but the "grades" I was given were across the bored mediocre. My poor boss prefaced each "grade" with a "Please remember that this is a baseline and everyone, including me was given this grade for everythign." Finally I told her she didn't have to say that anymore because I know it wasn't her choice.

My feeling from the review was that her boss - or upper management as a whole had told all the managers that they weren't permitted to give anyone above a baseline "grade". So HI! My name is Suzanne - I manage multi-million dollar projects that help to make huge product decisions for world wide companies - but I'm just "effective"!

She also handed me my merit raise... 3%. THREE FUCKING PERCENT PEOPLE! DO you know how much that adds to my bi-weekly check?!?! A whopping 4 dollars. I was livid when I left. I couldn't figure out why my boss wanted me to leave for the weekend on that note to make this decision. She knew it wasn't the kind of review/raise that would be impressive. So I had to go on the theory that she was trying to tell me to take the other job.

I didn't have to think too hard on the weekend. I got an email from her that said she wanted me to jot down my current frustrations with the company and bring them to a meeting with her boss at 9AM first thing Monday morning. SO I took some time - and I thought about whether I wanted to be brutally honest or not. Of course - I'm me... I was brutally honest.

I was told during this meeting that I had been approved for a "industry standard" raise - which was 3K more. Bringing my salary to 38,550 but that the accounting department just hadn't given them a date yet for when it would go into effect. My bosses boss - the bitch of the world - told me it was highly confidential and that I couldn't tell anyone about it.

Which puts me in a weird spot - because I can't negotiate salary with the other company based on what they are GOING to pay me I can only negotiate based on what they actually DO pay me.

Regardless - I'm done. I'm done with the bosses boss. As much as I hate leaving my boss and love my comfort level. My mentor at work (girl who made the same transition I'm about to make) told me something very important - comfort=death. She's right - if I stay because I get to come and go as I please, I'm basically allowing myself to stay in a situation where it's "good enough".

Now - I wait. Wait for the official offer from the other company and wait to find out what my salary is going to be for the next year and where my career is headed.