Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Red Lips and No Friends - what's a girl to do

I'm sick of my friends flaking out on me. Ok... let me re-phrase that.... I'm sick of my FRIEND flaking on me. She makes plans and then comes back with some strange tale of what happened and why she couldn't get to her phone.

This is the same one I was worried about a few weeks ago because of her awful choices. I don't know maybe it's time to cut her lose.

Which brings me to the mysterious title of this post, because here I sit with wine stained red lips and no friends to speak of.

I've never been the type to have a bevvy of friends. I usually have one at a time. Like rationing. One good friend at a time that you tell everything to and trust with all of your secrets. My current one is turning out to be a dud. But if you get rid of them, and say... aaaah fuck it I'm sick of trying. Where does a 25 year old make a new best friend? work? gym? neighbor?

So I'm scared to let go of her, and it sounds awful selfish since the main reason is because I won't have that one best friend to fall back on when times are rough. Mr. M has tons of friends. TONS.
Sometimes I wonder if his male friends aren't just his friends but secretly have little crushes on him. He has about 15 friends I could name off of the top of my head who seriously vie for his attention. Like school girls trying to impress the popular boy in school. Then they play these weird games with me... you know... the "who knows Mr. M better" games. I think they are ridiculous.

So here I sit with Mr. M in vegas with his boyfriends all hoping to get their 15 minutes of Mr. M's attention and my best friend flaking on me.


I think I'll have another glass.


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