Who Is This Braxton Hicks You Speak Of

Tuesday we had our midwife appointment and we really liked this one. She was so sweet, and wrote me a referral for the physical therapist for my pelvic bone pain that I've been having.

The baby is head down now - or at least she was at the appointment and everything is absolutely perfect. My BP is normal like usual, urine check last time came out fine, heartrate for her is good, weight gain is steady and plateauing a bit. All in all we're good.

At least I thought...

Then Wednesday night I was making dinner and was all of a sudden doubled over in pain. It felt like a muscle was being pulled in my bottom lower left abdomen. Image a if you pulled a hamstring except it was in your stomach. I squirmed on the floor saying, "ouch ouch OUCH OUCHIE OUCH!" until I found a good position and it subsided. Ahhhhh, sweet relief.

Mr. M came in from the grill outside to find me laying on the kitchen floor panting from the release of the 'pulling pain'. As I was about to explain what I was doing on the floor and that no I haven't lost my mind I was just having a muscle pulling sensaaaaaaaaatioooo OUCH! - It came back. Same pain, same intensity, but I was lying in my new found comfort position why did the pain come back?

So I squirmed some more, crawled into the living room and laid down on the carpeted floor until I found my 'good position' again and the pain subsided. He's looking at me with a skeptical eye, I can feel it. "What was THAT?!" he said. My response (NAIVE MUCH) was, "I don't know its this muscle, I think I pulled a stomach muscle somehow."

So I'm explaining to him that I think the pulling is better now and sit on the couch with him. A few minutes pass and then WHAM! another "pull". He says, "we're going to the hospital right now!"

"No, no no... it's not... it's ... just... a muscle.pull. aaaaaaarrrrrghhhhh!"

I'm squirming and moaning on the floor. Assuring him this is NOT what a contraction feels like, even though I have no idea what a contraction feels like as I've never been pregnant before. I beg him to just call the midwife instead as I would feel like a HUGE dumbass if I went in and it was a pulled muscle.

He hands me the phone because he hates the idea and wants to just head into the hospital instead. I leave a message with the answering dude explaining in detail that I am NOT in labor and that these are not even contractions - just muscles pulling. Ummm, sure... whatever crazy pregnant lady.

The midwife, bless her heart, calls me back within a few minutes. I'm explaining to her that it's just a stomach muscle that is being pinched or pulled or something. She asks me if there is a pattern and I assure there is no pattern. Until Mr. M pipes in from the background, "YES THERE IS - 5 MINUTES APART!" I'm like, WHA? You were timing them?

He said he had been timing them since he found me on the kitchen floor in the first place. Isn't he brilliant? She says to start a bath and drink about 2 glasses of water, if I have 2 more I need to go to the hospital. Also, that she wouldn't stop the labor if I were to progress at this point seeing as I'm 34 weeks.

WHOA WHOA WHOA!

First of all, I'm not in laboooooooor OUCH! It's back! I hand the phone to Mr. M and he talks to her till it subsides and the phone comes back to me. She says this is just too bizarre to not be contractions. Take a bath immediately and call her back if/when we're heading to the hospital.

Pshaw right! I am not in labor, these are NOT contractions, all of these people are crazy.

I get in the tub. Have 1 more "muscle pull", then a smaller one... then nothing.

They stopped.

I got out and felt fine. She called back anyway and explained in very slow and direct language that those were indeed contractions. Next time if they last an hour, go to the hospital.

OK, so maybe I'm in denial, maybe I'm not. It's just that it didn't FEEL like how everyone else describes it. There was not "hard all over" belly, no "squeezing" feeling, no "pressure", just a centralized muscle that was pulling in only the bottom left part of my belly. If that is a contraction then WHOA, I'm totally unprepared.